The Not So Winning Face of Temperance

"I mean seriously, wouldn't you just keep drinking?"

Related, sad story: In 8th grade, we did a unit called "HerStory" and were each assigned a woman of note from American history.  Our history teacher gave me Frances Willard, one of the leaders of the Women's Christian Temperance Union.  

After I quite literally cried over the sheer boredom of it all, good old Mrs. McCallum explained that she gave me this joyless, probably miserably closeted lesbian because she knew I was the only one who would actually stick with it and finish the project.  That said a lot about the girl who got Janis Joplin, yes, but did not really make me feel any better!